Special Report: Gullet Stuffer III
Local eating competition gets soup-ed up
Sept. 11, 2021 — Seattle’s Central District is no stranger to backyard barbecues, local art exhibitions, and many other sorts of social gatherings. Today, however, passersby may notice that something different is simmering on 23rd & Pine. Young people in formal wear are pouring into the backyard, beef broth burbles in a crystal fountain on the driveway, and the sidewalk is chalked with the words “Gullet Stuffer.”
Gullet Stuffer was founded by Maxwell Cromett, who started the now-annual competitive eating event with a hot dog eating contest in the summer of 2018 (in which this author placed 2nd in the amateur division). That was followed by a pizza roll-centric Gullet Stuffer II the next summer, featuring higher production values and an exponentially growing fanbase. When the COVID-19 pandemic scrapped a planned NYC edition, Cromett launched the MegaBites webseries: a virtual pentathlon of eating challenges that lasted nearly the full year of quarantine.
Today, we are once again able to gather to watch brave competitors—some new, some Gullet Stuffer veterans—push the limits of digestion by downing as much canned soup as possible.
Cromett takes care to emphasize the community aspect of the event too, which kicked off with a 3-hour preparty featuring local sponsors and performers, as well as a smorgasbord of audience engagement activities.
As daylight begins to fade into dusk, the soup stockpile is hustled out of the kitchen and the participants in the amateur division take the stage. For the next ten minutes, all eyes are on the swill of Atlantic Vegetarian Vegetable Soup being guzzled down the line.
After a five minute vomit-free waiting period, a winner is crowned: Mark Bechtel, with a count of 4.7 (15 oz.) cans. Live music, lavender essential oils, and soft groans from the athletes fill the air as anticipation turns to tonight’s main event: the Professional Division.
Under the lurid orange glow of a custom neon sign, steaming cans of Campbell’s Chunky Chicken Noodle Soup are delivered to the stage. One by one, Maxwell (who, it should be noted, walked out to the Caesar Flickerman theme from The Hunger Games) announces our pro competitors to raucous applause.
At the signal, soup is slopped into bowls and the slurping begins. Defending champion Daniel Herzog philosophized that “speed will not be as important as quantity,” intending to pace himself for the 10-minute slog. Others were not as measured, forsaking the provided cutlery to scoop broth with their bare hands. Sanguine spray splatters the tablecloth, unclear if it is bile or backwash in the chiaroscuro of the night.
The clock runs out, and the visibly discomfited roster looks on as the judges methodically measure each athlete’s consumption. Tallying a stunning 74.4 ounces of soup (four full 18.6 oz cans) , Carter Burns is crowned this year’s GULLET STUFFER CHAMPION.
Carter offers his fans a brief, inspirational message before heading out to celebrate:
“I’m gonna go throw up pretty bad, hope everybody has a good night!”